I must confess that I’m struggling.

You know how I like to try and put a positive spin on transits? See the future silver lining through the shit cloud? Bury my head in the sand a little? Right now I’m struggling to do that.

I’m watching someone who doesn’t deserve it go through something so chronically crappy that my heart breaks every time I think of it. I can’t do anything- nor do they expect me to- no one really can. There are simply no words, only ears or hugs or support. And you’re right, who does deserve it? I try to be normal, but my normal is no longer our normal and is especially no longer their normal. I, at least, still have a normal.

Today we talked about how long this set of transits has to run, what else could possibly happen. I know the answer to the first, but not the second.

Uranus is involved, Pluto is involved, the Ascendant is involved, the Midheaven is involved. Once those aspects are finished, Uranus will go on to join their Aries Mars and Sun, with Pluto back for another stoush later.

To paint the picture a little clearer, we’re talking right now:

• Moon in Scorpio on the cusp of the 8th. Saturn will station direct on it.
• Transiting Pluto to the MC. Pluto stationed exactly on the point…it will be back twice more.
• Uranus transiting the Ascendant. It’s just past it now- by a degree…it will be back twice more.

It won’t be non stop- outer planet transits aren’t like that. There’ll be periods of respite, and periods of action, periods where they’ll feel like jumping out of their skin with restlessness, or running from the ball of something that seems to be lodged in their chest. There’ll be times where the exhaustion goes bone deep and they don’t feel like they’ll ever sleep again, and times where they’ll feel like something is about to blow. There’ll be breakthroughs and, with luck, happiness- or something like it. And in the background, the loneliness of the Saturn/Moon conjunction.

I went through the same set of transits for a few years a while back- but, although I experienced the emotions described above, what  I copped was relatively nothing- although at the time it didn’t feel like nothing. I didn’t experience any real loss- a little bruising perhaps. For someone who lives with the ease of grand trines (more on that next week…), any set back seems like Mount Everest…

I still feel the remains of that ball of pain or whatever it was in my chest that I needed to run from. I live daily with Pluto and Uranus oppositions- perhaps that made a difference…I don’t know the answer. I know others who’ve escaped completely intact.

The thing is, when I looked at the chart earlier this year we talked about how stuff would get hurled that would change the direction of their life, their role, their family story, their relationships. For ever. We talked about how this would be bigger than anything that’s been hunted down and dealt with before. It felt like that. It felt bigger than that.

I would never have predicted what’s happened- nor would I have wanted to.

My mother asked me that the other day- why I don’t look at trying to predict particular events. My answer to her was simple:

• because if it is something good, I’ll be so focused on waiting for it to happen, that I’ll forget to enjoy today
• because if it is something dreadful, I’ll be so worried about something that I’m powerless to change, that I’ll forget to enjoy today.

What my friend is going through is random and uncontrollable. Pluto is involved so it’s all powerful. Uranus is involved, so it’s unpredictable. For someone whose nature is to assume control and fix stuff, this is unimaginable.

The only thing I can safely predict with a Pluto/Uranus transit of this nature is that a few years from now my friend will look back and not recognise their life. What was normal before this began will be replaced by a new sort of normal. It will be something that they currently have no idea what it will look like. It will be something that will somehow emerge from the ashes of what is currently there- or rather, no longer there. But how can they think about that now? Why should they? It doesn’t help- not yet. Why should they feel anything other than a deep to the bones sadness and anger at the unfairness of life?

It’s why it pisses me off hearing people talking about journeys and gifts and some greater fricking plan. Sure they mean well, but it doesn’t help. They all have a normal to go back to.

I hope that I’ll always try to find a bright side to scary transits- we all experience them differently.

But right now? I’m struggling.