I have Venus in Aries, so this post every year is always one that I love writing- partly because of that Aries energy and partly because it means that my Venus Return (and at least one reasonably decent hair day) is just around the corner.
Venus doesn’t particularly like being in Aries. Technically, she’s said to be in the sign of her detriment- in the opposite sign to the sign she rules. This doesn’t mean that it’s bad- just that it’s different.
You see, Venus is all about the things (and people) that make us feel good, and how we attract or charm those things (and people) into our lives.
The thing is, in Aries, her charm is more direct than subtle, and rather than attracting, she’s more likely to hunt it down herself. And if she doesn’t get it? Think of toddlers in shopping aisles across the country. This makes sense- Aries is ruled by Mars, the God of War, so Venus in Aries is heavily influenced by Mars.
In Pisces Venus is able to get what she wants in a Pisces way- often through the manipulation of others, sometimes through playing the victim. In Pisces she can be the damsel in distress waiting to be rescued. In Pisces, Venus is ultra feminine.
In Aries, if she wants something she just straps on her boots and her attitude and marches right on in to get it…for herself. In Aries she can look after herself. In Aries, Venus doesn’t need a hero to save her- she is quite capable of being her own hero.
In Aries she likes a challenge- whether that be a physical challenge or the type of challenge that has my Aries Miss working out just how she can beat her Scorpio father in whatever their latest battle of wills happens to be.
How to make Ms Aries want something more? Withhold it, make her work for it, keep it just a little bit out of reach- delay her gratification. How to piss her off? Do the same.
She’ll stamp her feet (sometimes figuratively speaking, sometimes not) hers until you listen/it gets taken away/her attention is diverted. And diversion is actually the best tactic to use. In fact, when dealing with Venus in Aries/ Aries woman in a tantrum, just think about how you would deal with your 3 year old- the two can be very similar.
Venus represents the feminine, and in Aries, Venus is a different sort of feminine- a wilful, direct, independent sort of feminine… If you’re a woman with Venus in Aries, that could be where the problems start.
Essentially we’re not made the way little girls are supposed to be made of- even if she’s as heavily Pisces influenced as I am, there is no sugar and spice anywhere to be seen.
We’re not supposed to go hard after what we want- we’re supposed to charm it into life.
We’re not supposed to be selfish, we’re not supposed to argue back, we’re not supposed to do many of the things we do.
We show our affection vigorously, directly and assertively. We can DIY for ourselves, and we don’t need someone else to do it for us.
We don’t compromise if compromising is unfair. We don’t keep the peace for the sake of it. We don’t blame our weakness, but survive on our strength.
We don’t sit around and wait for things to change- we go out and make it change. We take charge.
If you’re a woman with Venus in Aries, it can be tough reconciling all of this with the concept of how you should be acting, dressing, and reacting. If we let it, it can mess with our idea of who we are, of who we need to be, of what our identity, our feminine identity is.
Venus in Aries needs to move, needs to feel strong and needs to have something to chase after in order to feel good. Not to be too simplistic or tongue in cheek about it, but if you’re overweight and you have Venus in Aries, chances are that you’re also feeling weak, compromised, and without creative purpose. You might also be feeling strongly that your identity and purpose is secondary to that of someone else- that you’re not being seen or heard.
The solution? Nothing’s ever simple. Naturally you need to move, but more importantly, you need a mission, a challenge- preferably one that is visionary or creative.
Of course you also need to consider how your Sun and Moon are being satisfied- amongst other things- but you get the idea.
As for love- if you have Venus in Aries you love quickly, impulsively, competitively & independently. If you have ever woken in the middle of the night with the sudden urge to sing a Partridge Family song, odds are you have Venus in Aries.
The Aries Venus woman is drawn to a Mars type man. Whilst she can look after herself perfectly well, she doesn’t want a man who needs looking after. She wants a hero, even though she doesn’t need one. She wants someone she can battle with and have great make up sex with later, someone who knows what he wants, someone who doesn’t make it too easy for her.
What does this mean? He might have his Sun, Moon, Venus or Mars in Aries, a packed 1st house or maybe Sun conjunct Mars. And trust me, if he has even a combination of these factors, he will sweep you off your feet! And, like the song says, you will feel his approach like a fire in your blood. Oh, be still my beating heart…
The biggest issue with loving when you have Venus in Aries, is sustaining the excitement and interest past bin night. Aries likes things to be new and fresh, and business as usual very often doesn’t fit into that.
How to keep Venus in Aries? The trick is to leave her alone before she knows she needs to be left alone, don’t give in to her, don’t avoid conflict, and don’t expect her to fit into any traditional idea of how the perfect woman should be, dress and behave. She is her own woman, and very likely she’s on her own mission.
The man with Venus in Aries is most likely going to be attracted to a partner with Arian qualities- someone who is a little impulsive, perhaps headstrong and absolutely independently minded. She will be someone who can look after herself. She will be his hero…and probably have at least one set of red lingerie.
Sound like you? If you have Venus in Aries, are a woman with the Sun in Aries, Venus in the 1st house and even Venus conjunct Mars- actually probably Venus square or opposite to Mars would also do the trick.
If you have Venus in Aries and are having problems expressing yourself, check out what other planets are aspecting Venus- especially Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto. Even the “easy” aspects by these guys will alter your ability to tap into your Venus.
The title song? You can listen to it here…