Almost Here

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So I got a rejection from a publisher yesterday for my chick lit novel.

As far as rejections go, this was a good one.

Usually what you get from publishers is silence. It’s deafening.

This publisher had called for the full manuscript (after submission of the first 3 chapters and synopsis) and read the whole thing- even after she had decided that it was more womens fiction than romance. It is. And she publishes romance- so it doesn’t fit. She told me that. She didn’t have to tell me that she enjoyed it, but she did. She could have just told me it didn’t fit their titles.

As I said, this was a good rejection- I’m getting to know the difference.

It was also the most frustrating one I’ve received.

I knocked this manuscript out very quickly last November/December. The first 50,000 words in NANOWRIMO and the remainder before Christmas. I loved the story from the very first paragraph. Truly.

I re-drafted it quickly as well. It just feels right.

Here’s the thing though, it feels like something is almost right, that it’s almost going to happen, that I’m almost on the right track. I must be getting closer though- these days I’m getting callbacks, I’m getting encouragement, I’m getting constructive and specific feedback. I feel like I’m almost there- and that’s usually when I run into trouble.

I’ve got so many projects on the almost finished list:

  • There’s the astro book on making the most of your birth chart to be the best you can be. The first draft is done, but it needs work. A lot of it. I’m scared to finish it- especially since I feel far from my best.
  • There’s the ebook on return charts. The first draft is 75% done.
  • There’s the beginner astrology course. I’m writing two versions- one to deliver on line, and one to pitch to the local community college as a face to face. I’m scared to finish that too- what happens if no one comes?
  • There’s my 1st novel. It falls somewhere in between womens fiction and romance. It’s had 2 call backs from publishers- one womens fiction and one romance. One suggested it needs more romance, the other suggested it needs less. It’s been through a structural editor, yet somehow it still all feels too close to me. Possibly because it’s my first.

I do “almost” well.

It’s having a heap of potential and “almost” delivering on “almost” all of it.

In the past I’ve done just enough to “almost” master something, before declaring myself bored already and drifting onto something else.

Part of that is Pisces and Neptune influence- the whole idea of something not quite living up to the illusion so drifting on.

It’s also very Aries and very 1st house behaviour. The not finishing something. The clashing priorities. The woulda shoulda couldas. I know so many Aries who do the same. Something stops them from finishing the job. Sometimes it’s boredom, very often it’s fear. I’m a little of both. Sometimes I am honestly bored, but more often I get scared- scared that I won’t be the best or be the first or be what it is that my heart tells me it can be. So I make excuses. They sound reasonable.

A wise coach told me the other week that I need to do my own personal mission statement- like they do for companies. Because that’s what I am- my own brand, my own business, with my own mission.

Then, when I’m presented with an option that could turn my almost there into a wander down a completely different path, I have a reminder to bring myself back on course.

This New Moon falls in my 2nd house, conjunct Venus. Coming just days after my Venus Return it’s a potent reminder to determine what’s really important and letting the rest slide.

My New Moon mantra is to remove the adjective “almost” from my mindset.

I am here. I like the sound of that.

I’ll be away for the next couple of weeks. I have a few posts scheduled out, and will be checking in on Facebook as internet access and time permits. If you want to keep up with my travels, I’ll be blogging occasionally over at and anyways.

 

4 comments

  1. Jo, I’m really excited for you–you’re on the ‘verge’, and that means there’s such momentum that even you probably can’t stop it! (I know all too well how easy it is to sabotage oneself) Much good luck to you–at this point, it’s just a matter of time, with maybe only a little push from you needed to send it all forward–I’m happy that I’ll be able to say I knew you when 🙂

  2. Is it OK to say, “get over it, scaredy-cat and just DO IT”? Some of us are waiting to buy these as yet unpublished books and e-books. Also, since I’m in Sydney I would totally come to the community group thing, to support you AND to learn stuff myself. So please, JUST DO IT!!

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