Venus and Mars are currently together in the Mars ruled fire sign of Aries. While the conjunction won’t be exact for 24 hours, they are at the same degree now and the energy will be with us for the next few days.

What does this mean?

At it’s most basic it means that what you want and the energy you’re prepared to put in to get it are aligned. That has to be a good thing….right?

It depends…doesn’t it always?

Mars and Venus are the archetypal male and female energies, so whenever they meet up, there is a passionate, sexual energy to it.  Hold that thought.

Any planet in Aries has their behaviour altered by Aries. It’s how they operate for that period of time.

In Mars ruled Aries, Venus behaves in a way that is not comfortable for her. She’s impulsive, she’s competitive, she’s determined, she’s challenging and she’s not at all passive. She’s an Amazon…she’s Wonder Woman…she’s Xena…and she’s prepared to do what it takes to get what she wants.

She’s not a princess- that’s not a bad thing, but she isn’t the typical feminine archetype. She’s something very different and completely wonderful.

Mars in Aries is, however, the quintessential male archetype.

So when the two come together in Aries, sparks will fly in a mighty, mighty way.

There’s also likely to be competition.

Competition, when healthy is not a bad thing. However, if you find yourself butting heads for the sake of butting heads or the sake of having the last word, it might be time to take a step back and look for a position of cooperation or compromise. Check that you’re fighting a battle that’s worth fighting, rather than fighting for the sake of fighting…or for the sake of making up. I’ll leave that one with you. Be clear, I’m talking about the clashing of two independent wills here.

The other thing about Aries is the ego.

The Sun is exalted in Aries, so ego is an especially big deal. And one of the best ways to satisfy our ego is through relationship with another.

Here’s the thing, these stars are great for starting something new, for having some fun, but, unless there is something else happening of a significant nature in your chart, a Venus/Mars conjunction will not usually be enough to signify a game changing relationship. This is especially the case in Aries, where things are done and decisions are made on impulse. If you’re starting something new with someone new under this transit, bear that in mind.

Another way in which we express ourselves is through creativity- and we are all creative in some way. Whether you express yourself through words, pictures, art, photography, dance, music, cooking or doing something for others, it’s still self expression…and self expression is creative.

Above all, in Aries, don’t over think it. Aries energy is enthusiastic and vital so you know what? JFDI- Just Flipping Do It!

I have Venus in Aries, so this post every year is always one that I love writing- partly because of that Aries energy and partly because it means that my Venus Return (and at least one reasonably decent hair day) is just around the corner.

Venus doesn’t particularly like being in Aries. Venus is all about the things that make us feel good and Aries is just so… obvious, direct, willful & challenging- not at all what Venus is supposed to be like.

Venus is the ruler of Taurus and Libra, so is much more at home draped nonchalantly across a chaise longue sipping champagne, receiving a manicure (with her free hand, of course) and being fed chocolates by a rather gorgeously buffed footballer rather than charging off to battle (or is that my fantasy?). She has loved the last few weeks in Pisces, where she can be super sensitive, indulge in total romantic fantasy and be just a tad non- discriminating in the love stakes (what did you say your name was again?). But all good things come to an end.

Aries, on the other hand is ruled by Mars, the God of War. Venus in Aries has to dust off the romance and becomes pure huntress to grab what she wants.  And if she doesn’t get it? Think of toddlers in shopping aisles across the country.

In Pisces Venus is able to get what she wants in a Pisces way- often through the manipulation of others, sometimes through playing the victim. In Pisces she can be the damsel in distress. In Pisces, Venus is ultra feminine.

In Aries, if she wants something she just straps on her boots, her red bra (any self respecting woman with Venus in Aries should have at least 1 red accessory…) and her attitude and marches right on in to get it…for herself. In Aries she can look after herself. In Aries she likes a challenge- whether that be a physical challenge or the type of challenge that has my nearly 15 year old Aries Miss working out just how she can beat her Scorpio father in whatever their latest battle of wills happens to be.

Venus in Aries is very much “me first” and is a lot more selfish in what she wants and when she wants it- and that is absolutely OK. How to make her want something more? Withhold it, make her work for it, keep it just a little bit out of reach, delay her gratification. How to piss her off? Do the same.

She also knows who she wants…for a time. If you have Venus in Aries you love quickly, impulsively, competitively & independently. If you have ever woken in the middle of the night with the sudden urge to sing a Partridge Family song, odds are you have Venus in Aries.

On the other hand, Venus in Aries knows just as clearly what she doesn’t want. And she will stamp those feet of hers until you listen/it gets taken away/her attention is diverted. And diversion is actually the best tactic to use. In fact, when dealing with Venus in Aries/ Aries woman in a tantrum, just think about how you would deal with your 3 year old- the two can be very similar.

The Aries Venus woman is drawn to a Mars type man. Whilst she can look after herself perfectly well, she doesn’t want a man who needs looking after. She wants a hero. She wants someone she can battle with & have great make up sex with later, someone who knows what he wants, someone who doesn’t make it too easy for her. Even if (like me) her Sun is in Pisces, she needs a real man- a Superman to sweep her off her feet.

What does this mean? He might have his Sun, Moon, Venus or Mars in Aries, a packed 1^st house or maybe Sun conjunct Mars. And trust me, if he has even a combination of these factors, he will sweep you off your feet! And, like the song says, you will feel his approach like a fire in your blood. Oh, be still my beating heart…

The man with Venus in Aries is most likely going to be attracted to a partner with Arian qualities- someone who is a little impulsive, perhaps headstrong and absolutely independently minded. She will be someone who can look after herself. She will be his hero…and probably have at least 1 set of red lingerie.

Sound like you? If you have Venus in Aries, are a woman with the Sun in Aries, Venus in the 1^st house and even Venus conjunct Mars- actually probably Venus square or opposite to Mars would also do the trick.

And the song? Holding Out For a Hero of course! Naturally the Bonnie Tyler version- the lyrics still give me goosebumps- even with the cheesy 80s fluoro whips, cap guns and faked dramatics…

Aberdeen, Hong Kong. Pic by me.

Regular readers have heard me wax lyrical from time to time about those soupy dumplings I first tried in Hong Kong, and later wherever I can get them…xiao long bao…

Anyways, when I was in Hong Kong, I could easily have had these 3 meals a day. In case you’re interested, there are about 310 calories in a serving of 5 of the succulent little beauties. Being on limited funds, being on my own, and being in a new country, I would grab these wherever I could, although there was this great place right next to where I used to stay at the Excelsior, that was just a little too convenient.

There is this restaurant over there which does dumplings to Michelin rated standards- which sounds like a dream come true for me, except for one teeny little detail. You get a ticket and wait. Hello? One of my favourite tweeps tweeted today that he was facing a 3 hour wait. At lunch time on a Monday? You can’t be serious. I get the irrits at a 40 minute wait at our local yumcha, and time any visits to Din Tai Fung to keep the waiting time to the absolute minimum.

I don’t do queuing, and I most certainly do not do delayed gratification. I have Venus in Aries and trust me, when I want something, I am going to want to hunt it down Right Now. And with Venus square Jupiter, I want a lot…Right Now.

My neighbor and I are doing these tarot classes at the moment and she laughed last week when I asked “don’t you ever just want to go straight to the outcome card?” I was serious.

In contrast, a friend with Venus in Scorpio is painstakingly putting away money each week for a special weekend she wants to take her husband on. For her the anticipation will make it so much sweeter- especially when she breaks out the new lingerie saved for the occasion. Speaking of which…anything new? I have to wear it immediately.

Another friend with Venus in Taurus is waiting for a particular man she knows and wants…and has been, waiting and wanting, that is, for some time. For her sake I sure hope that he is worth it. Someone else I know with Venus in Virgo delays doing things until the time (or the finances or the situation) is exactly right- which it never seems to be.

My mother (Venus in Aquarius) used to say “you can’t miss what you don’t have, Joanne.” She might be able to detach, but I can’t. I do miss it, I yearn for what I can’t have- usually an opportunity that isn’t coming around quickly enough. Yes, Pluto is involved heavily in my chart and inconjunct Venus, so I obsess a bit and then I move on- to something else, and yearn for that with the same intensity.

I know the argument for waiting is that the taste is so much sweeter- sort of like the first time you kiss someone after wanting to for so long. You can only ever experience a first kiss once, a first anything once. But surely once there has been a first, you can then look forward to the second- unless the first was pretty crap, in which case it was better that you find out early in the process rather than wait and be disappointed…in my humble opinion anyway.

They say that if you get it easily it isn’t worth as much, but what if when you get it, it really wasn’t worth the wait? To use the same analogy, what if he is a crap kisser? All that time that you could have spent doing something else? And if he is great, think of how many wonderful kisses you would miss out on while waiting?

The Economist in me thinks also about the opportunity cost of delaying gratification:

• What if the book ending is naff, the dog dies, the heroine gets the wrong bloke, or it is otherwise really disappointing? Your time would have been better spent reading something you enjoy or can learn something from.
• What is the movie ending is not how it should be? Ie the dog dies, the heroine gets the wrong bloke, or it is otherwise really disappointing? That’s 3.5 hours (including travel, parking and waiting time) that you’ll never get back.
• What if you miss out on something in the meantime? And yes, I know the whole “the one you miss out on is the one you never get”, but I’m Plutonian, so, what if?

So yes, this all makes me sound like a spoiled bitch, and I guess I am. I am actively trying to stop and feel gratitude before moving on. I am also trying to actively remind myself that things happen when the time is right for them to happen, but have to admit to more than a small part of me (the Pluto part) wondering whether there is something that I can do to hurry the process up just a tad.

I googled the Hong Kong Dumpling House. Apparently the dumplings are miraculously good- like dumplings elevated into something higher. I guess if I snacked on something first (hunger never results in good manners), and concentrated on the people watching opportunities, or did a spot of shopping in the meantime, or even read a book while waiting, I could manage the wait…if the dumplings really are that good.

How does your Venus reflect what you want and how long you are prepared to wait to get it? How do you respond when you lose or miss out on something of value?

Todays word is “red”. I have Venus in Aries, so it stands to reason that I will have a penchant for red- but didn’t realise quite how many red nail polishes I had until I lined them up. What is scary is that I have a similar number of blacks (yes, Mars in Scorpio…). And before you ask, yes, there are variants in black- you have your black black, platinum black, sparkly black, purple black, blue black, red black.

What you find beautiful, the way you like to decorate yourself, the things that make you feel good are the territory of Venus. Mars is more about what turns you on and off, & how you go about getting what you want.

Given that the Moon will shortly move into Libra, it is perhaps fitting that todays photo has a beauty theme. Libra, being a Venus ruled sign, is very much about beauty- not so much the sensual pleasures of Taurus, but more the idea of beauty, the concept of peace, the notion of harmony. This influence will be with us for much of the weekend, so it is a perfect time to dress up and to the social butterfly thing.

Tomorrows’ word is “loud”…better start thinking about that one in advance!

I reckon that the dude who said “good things come to those who wait” is probably still waiting.

I’m not good at waiting. There is very little in this world that I would be prepared to queue for, and I am the person sitting back in the theatre/ plane/ whatever who impatiently looks at her watch expecting the show to start/ plane to take off/ whatever exactly at the advertised time. As much as it sounds dreadfully romantic and wonderful, you will never find me at one of those jazz festivals (or whatever) in the vines (on the grass, in the park, whatever)- quite simply because the idea of sitting around all day waiting for something to happen doesn’t turn me on at all.

Astrologically there are reasons for that in my chart (namely Venus in Aries in the 2^nd and a mountain of Uranus contacts). As with all chart aspects we can choose to make the most or as little of the more “challenging” contact points, but quite frankly I can’t be bothered with that palaver either.

Every so often something really minor kicks it into action- someone in the wrong queue at the supermarket, someone swimming really slowly and hogging the fast lane at the pool, an idiot sitting right on my blind spot when I am trying to change lanes from the Harbour Tunnel lane back onto the main bridge road. My impatience is triggered and the hard hitters in my chart (Pluto and Mars) rise to the occasion.

But boy have I been waiting this February- waiting for it to be over!

For those who aren’t aware, I did FebFast this month. What is that? Essentially it is the month you send alcohol on a holiday, but the real reason is to raise money for alcohol related education awareness programs and associated charities. I wasn’t particularly hung up on that (although it was for a good cause)- I just wanted to prove to myself that I could do it…and win a bet.

Having said that, we have pretty busy social lives and during the month I had no problems saying “no” when out with other people. As hubby pointed out, most of the time I limit myself to only 1 or 2 glasses of wine anyway. I have massive control issues so very rarely allow myself more than that- especially when out.

With as much Neptune as I have in my chart, I have to carefully watch all things Neptunian or addictive- and alcohol is ruled by Neptune and is all too often the Pisceans escape route of choice. So this exercise, as well as being a bet, gave all the Pluto energy in my chart a chance to flex the willpower muscles.

So, why then was it so hard? Sure I missed the end of day relaxation, but I substituted that habit with sparking mineral water or soda and sipped it from a wine glass. No, I hated it so much simply because I wasn’t allowed to drink-because I had forbidden myself to do it. It’s like when you’re told not to think about or worry about something, so of course it is the only thing you do think or worry about.

I gave up other sugars in my diet this time last year and really didn’t have a problem doing so- I’m one of those rare people who genuinely doesn’t like the aftertaste of sweetness and we rarely have any pre-prepared sauces or foods in the house. Yet for the first week or so, the sugar cravings were incredible. I reached for the occasional diet coke as a substitute & finished the 1^st week almost a kilo heavier!

That one took me by surprise. Whilst I know that biochemically the body deals with ethynol or fermented sugars differently to fructose, it still sends the same messages to the brain. My brain was craving the sugar hit is usually got from the wine.

A nutritionist friend recommended chromium supplements and that (and herbal teas with cinnamon, cardamom & other warming spices) helped and I finished the month 1.5kgs lighter- with no other changes to diet or exercise routines.

I’m not a great sleeper, and far from sleeping better, I slept worse in that I still felt wound up by the time I would normally go to bed. My dreams (which are always extremely colourful) woke me far more regularly and for far longer each night…which made the getting up for 6am gym sessions a tad easier…

So, what was good about it?

Firstly I broke a habit. I had been struggling with reducing the nightly glasses during the week and now know that I can do it. In fact, I probably won’t have a glass tonight and will wait until the weekend.

I proved to myself that I can do it. I also proved to myself that I can effectively substitute habits. The swap it don’t stop it methodology is good for people like me. A friend taught me the value of soda water as a chaser or substitute and it works a treat.

It was the final step in the no sugar stakes, and that (with the way my body chooses to deal with insulin) is a very good thing.

I learned that I need to be a little gentler with myself. The reason the initial sugar thing didn’t phase me was because I didn’t impose it, I didn’t forbid myself. Instead I sort of sidled up to it sideways and gradually started substituting things like commercial tomato sauces with fresh salsa, and breakfast muesli with home-made, and sweetened low fat yoghurt with natural. The changes were so tiny and so gentle I didn’t really notice them.

Oh, and I raised a little money, so thanks to those who helped me out- even though I didn’t seek sponsorship (it wasn’t about that) knowing that others had sponsored me helped me stay honest (I always honour commitments made to others more than I do to myself…which is sorta sad in itself, I guess).

Will I do it again? I say probably not, but then again, with me? Who knows?  Dry July is coming up and I do many stupid things for the sake of a bet or a challenge- my Aries Venus and Scorpio Mars insist on it- just don’t make me wait or queue for it!

This months challenge is the photo a day one set by Fat Mum Slim. I’ll post mine daily here.